Wednesday, October 01, 2008

An Encounter On The Street

A shining example of the intelligence and articulacy of the nation's youth shouted "YOU F***IN LONG-'AIRED BASTARD" at me as I was walking down to the internet cafe a few minutes ago.

Long-'aired I obviously am.

F***ing, I would like to be.

Bastard, thankfully, I am not.

I hope that clears up any misconceptions you might have had, you delightful young man.

Of course, the likelihood of you reading this is small. The likelihood of you reading anything is small, other than the big words on your cigarette packet. But one doesn't wish to stereotype.


Anonymous said...


All This Trouble... said...


I was just telling someone the other day that I'm thirty three years old and a married, mother of three and people still feel the need to yell things at me as I cross parking lots or city streets. I guess it takes all kinds to make the world go round but it would be nice if they could just mind their manners.

My grandmother used to say that those sorts of folks are just jealous. Was this fellow follicley challenged?

Bruce Hodder said...

I don't know, he was wearing one of those stupid little white baseball caps half the kids on the streets of England seem to consider a good fashion choice (for some bizarre reason). But I could see two massive ears poking out from underneath the cap so he couldn't have had THAT much hair.

My abundant greying tresses seem to provoke an extreme reaction in lots of people, though. A 27-year-old woman I know even told me that long hair wasn't manly. I said, "Tell that to the pillaging Vikings," but I think the reference was lost on her.

Bruce Hodder said...

I've had sweeter...but there WAS a certain humour to it.Especially in the fact that I put my head down and walked on, then hurried away like a Dostoyevskian hero transplanted to the twenty-first century and got my impotent revenge on the internet. "No bravery awards for you then," somebody commented last night as we were watching a cringe-making show on tv where politicians and tv stars gave awards to brave little disabled kids.

All This Trouble... said...

Baseball caps are pretty big in the states and more so in the deep south. I know the look.