I had a letter from my pal Gordon Brown this morning. Well, not Gordon directly. It was from a fellow (or a woman) in the Direct Communications Unit at Downing Street who signed his (or her) name "G. Edwards". Steady with the over-familiarity, G.
Some time ago I wrote a letter to Gordon suggesting that he should bring whatever influence he had to bear over his chums in the Chinese Government--turning a blind eye to their infamy while trampling all over Iraq because of Saddam's must have earned him some (ahem) Brownie points--and see if he couldn't persuade those vicious, murdering swine to leave Tibet out of the vainglorious journey of the Olympic Torch (which, it's worth noting, was started by the Nazis and has nothing to do with the original Olympic ideal).
Well, Gordon's obviously too busy doing his reverse Robin Hood act--robbing the poor to feed the rich--to give little old me his full attention. But according to G. Edwards my views "have been carefully noted". And shredded with all the other communication from the "unhelpful" element among Labour's erstwhile supporters, no doubt.
And in the meantime China goes on oppressing and executing, while Gordon hunkers down in the bunker at Downing Street drinking himself into a stupor every night, cursing the electorate and making crazed anonymous abusive calls to Tony Blair, whom he still blames for everything that's gone wrong.
All right, I made the last part up.
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