first date/ last date

she sd., why don't you get a haircut?
that past-the-shoulder look
just don't go in the noughties.

i sd., i am a traveller
from nineteen sixty-eight.
i'm going down to woodstock
when i've done my business here.

she sd., where's woodstock?

i sd., it's outside oxford.
don't you read "inspector morse"?

she sd., oh! that used to be on telly,
with that bloke from "the sweeney".

yes, dennis waterman, i sd.,
pushing my glass across the table.

she sd., i see it's my round!

i sd., bright as well as pretty.

but can you get them in, she sd.
if i don't go to the toilet soon,
i'm gonna pee my fucking pants.